I have .N.O. motivation to do anything today!
Here it is, 9:15 and its really been a long day already. I couldn’t bear to get up and run today…I’ll do it tonight though…haha yeah right…but seriously…I HAVE TO! Someone give me some motivation to MOVE! Ever since I got this injury, I have been lazy, unhealthy, and stressed! Not to mention tired! Isn’t it weird how that works? Its probably because I don’t have that stress release I usually so when I run…bla bla bla…
It might just be the mood im in, but this is a fairly personal post for me…so sorry if you don’t want to read it…ha-ha it’s my venting space! So…just a warning…this might be a little EMO!
Like I said, it’s been a long day, a long week and probably the hardest, longest year of my young life to date.
Here are a few highlights from this year, good and bad, in not really any particular order…this might be a lot, not all by all means, but a lot of the important highlights of my life sorry if it gets a little long. This is memory lane!
- I got engaged
- I moved home
- I started planning for a wedding
- I took a tough crash tax course from H&R Block.
- I started training for a Marathon with my dad and sister. (Dublin ho!)
- I went to a wedding fair with my best friend and sister
- I spend long distance time on the phone
- Beck and I won Avril tickets from a radio station when we wrote a song for it (they were two girls, loved Avril Lavigne…can I make it anymore obvious?)
- I celebrated my birthday (Beck threw me a surprise party!)
- I got pushed around.
- I tried to keep a relationship together as I watched it fall apart
- I started going back to church
- I called off an engagement
- My puppy died
- I had a meltdown (one of many)
- I got a card and flowers from my big sister.
- My beautiful cousin ASHLEY had her second baby! A boy!
- I ran 125 laps around the track at the YMCA (it was too cold outside to run 10 miles!)
- I TRIED running away to Utah again…but gave my engagement ring back…and then came back home
- I struggled with addiction
- My ex fiancé moved to Calgary and we tried dating again
- Beck and I had a WHINE and cheese party!
- I worked at H&R Block 7 days a week 12 hour days for almost 4 months
- I got my heart broken again.
- I went into seclusion
- I.TRIED.SO.HARD.
- My best friend called off her engagement and moved away.
- My sister in law LIAM had her second baby! (She’s beautiful!)
- I met a boy
- I.thought.I.fell.in.love.again
- I.CHANGED.
- I cried over ovaltine with my mom.
- My whole family ran the family fun run.
- My little brother left home
- The date I was supposed to get married came, my sisters took me to great falls for shopping <3
- I almost lost a friend.
- I started REALLY talking to my dad
- I said I love you again.
- My friend and her husband got pregnant (she now has the baby! A little early, but he’s here!)
- I lied.
- A few of my closest friends and my sister Sarah celebrated one year anniversaries
- I started working downtown for sword energy doing accounts payable
- I got Itchy to run away…again
- I ran my first HALF MARATHON
- NATALIE CLARK started running hills with me
- I tried to forget my old life…with not a lot of success
- Beck and her family moved into our house while they built their new one!
- I looked at engagement rings…again
- I smiled and laughed…A LOT
- I rode a motorcycle everywhere, in a skirt
- I kissed a boy
- My friend JESSIE got engaged
- I went for lunch downtown with my dad and cried in the middle of a food court
- I bought a new camera
- I decided to go travelling
- I offered to give up everything for something, because I wanted to
- I drove to Cardston on a motorcycle
- I got injured running.
- People started leaving for school
- I tried to not get hurt again
- I struggled with letting go of the past and almost lost a lot for it.
- I put my head down and worked.
Now here I am again, working in my little office downtown, trying to get my head around the rest for his year, I hate not knowing where my life will be. I hate feeling let down. I love feeling love, I Hate feeling hate. And I hate feeling like nobody can understand what im feeling…even me.
EMO.EMO.EMO I know...im sorry. like i said, its how im feeling, i'll get out and pound the pavement and we'll see how that makes me feel! we'll chat later, its time to work!
X.X
R.A.c.H
8 comments:
i still love you
Rach I love your guts
hope everything works out!
Rachel! I am so glad I found your blog! You are so adorable, I loved that post. I loved it because I haven't known what's going on in your life since Ecuador and I loved that you were so honest and just cute about everything. I hope you are doing well. It sounds like it's been a rough year. Well my dear, you are BEAUTIFUL. Why do you have to be so far away so we can't run together? Man, that would be fun. Keep in touch. -Teddy
aww im sorry you had a bad day hope you feel better!
-Andrea
We all need to have EMO days! We are girls right!? your blog is great! Hope tomorrow is a better day!
to think my rachy that list is ONLY THE BEGINNING! we always make it through we will do itagain...love you
I love the emo post... brings me RIGHT BACK to high school! love you rachie!!
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