Thank.you.

Life is like a FLASH. you blink. and.its.gone.

sooooo, Thanksgiving. WE decided to do the whole thanksgiving dinner on Sunday because...well, because we wanted to. it was FANTASTIC. seriously. my mom and Becka worked their little (seriously, little) butt's off for days coming up to this. and it was flawless. we had Sarah and Fran and Joe over, and just about everyone else in the fam, except of course Jared and Liam and their cute little family who is chipping way in Sask still...MISS YOU GUYS!

get this:

my car is broken and in the shop right? sooo.. I'm at church because Nat gave me a ride there, but she needed to leave early for her thanksgiving shindig, but in case you cant notice lately...I needed to be at church for more than that one hour...I'm trying to work my way out of a little hole I have dug myself here. ANYWAYS. I needed a ride home. as a glanced over the congregation I thought um....I don't really know anyone well enough here to ask them to drive me home...except....siiiiiigh. hey...Mr.C....can I ask you a favor?

yup yup, so I call my mom, and she practically begs me to ask him to stay for dinner, and like, sure, whatever...its just dinner. and MR.C. and my family get on tremendously. so I ask him and I got a distraught look and a ...umm well, maybe that's not a great idea. I say okay, and he walks me to my door and then leaves...well...

doesn't leave.

he runs back in about 2 minutes later and starts hanging out with my little brother and sister...weird. I guess he changed his mind, but nobody cared, everyone enjoys C's aura around our house. he really is a good guy. we had a good little chat, but nothing else happened. we just thoroughly enjoyed each others company..maybe a little too much? who cares at this point.

so we all ate, and then sat and said what were grateful for. started with dad, and then went oldest to youngest of the siblings and their families. when it got to me I got a little misty eyed, I'm not going to lie.

I said something along the lines of: I havent been home for thanksgiving in a few years...and I guess I'm just grateful that when I finally came home, all broken and beat down...I knew my family still cared. I'm so grateful that they didn't give up on me, and always supported me even when I was hating them and avoiding home and making stupid decisions....they were always there, and yet, giving me space to make mistakes. I talked about how I was grateful that my body could (kind of) run...so that I could start having real, good conversations with my dad, for the first time probably ever really...Ive come a long way since last thanksgiving. and I do have a lot to be thankful for.

later Sunday night I talked to Mr.sexy. on the phone...(we've been talking just about every night since he went to the rigs) its weird, we've gotten SO close. could I be getting attached? me? ICE COLD RACHEL CRAIG? no way....NO...umm...maybe not?

late late Sunday night I got a call from .X. yeah...the one and same who just blew me off. he wanted to see me before he left to go home...the last time he will see me before I leave for S.A...probably the last time ever. I agreed, feeling like my head could explode any minute... it was short. less than 5 minutes...I guess that was it. there wasn't a lot to say...eyes, motions and feelings told everything. he doesn't miss me. and its over. come on now Rach...get it through your head! but that's all I'm saying about it for now. I'm so out of fight its hilarious.


I'll close this one up with some fabulous pictures that we took on Saturday night at Natalie Clark's house! we got our fun fabulous Secretary Jordan out to play and take some HAWT pictures. it was very very fun.